Why Does "Personal Demons" Suck?

I've learned a lot over the years, and much of what I know about good writing comes from analyzing bad writing.

Obviously, we can all learn a little something from "Personal Demons."

So why does it suck? Oh, let us count the ways!

We could focus on the stilted language or flat characters. We could talk about the excess of adverbs. We could do a line-by-line critique, or focus on the big picture. We could crit it in a box, we could crit it with a fox. We could crit it with some ducks; we have to crit it, 'cause it sucks!

So that's my challenge to you, oh readers of this blog. Go back and look over the first installment of "Personal Demons." Try to figure out what made it suck so bad, and how we can all avoid those mistakes in the future. I'll give my critique in the next blog post.

Until then, happy shredding!